I was so looking forward to Holland -vs- Mexico. It was a relatively easy journey for me to get to the Dutch Consulate: a walk, a minibus ride, a cross continental ferry, a funicular railway, another walk and Bob’s your uncle, no problem.
I left plenty of time and starting the last leg of my journey was bang on schedule. Except I stupidly forgot that one thing you should always allow for when there’s a big game. I am talking of course of the mass LGBT rally.
Man in Wedding Dress Places Cap on Dutch Entry
I couldn’t get to the game on time because I was weaving in the opposite direction to thousands of colourful lesbians, gays, bi-sexuals and transgenders, all led by a guy in a wedding dress.
Eventually after sashaying through the smorgasbord of sexuality I made it to the gate of the consulate – only to met by a more formidable opponent. A straight A student of the ‘your name’s not on the list, you’re not coming in’ school of obstinacy. A frantic call to my already interned friend confirmed I most certainly was on the list, but neanderthal man was having none of it.
Eventually a diplomatic incident was avoided, and 30 minutes after kick-off I made it inside. Why did I want to watch Holland anyway you may ask?
Dutch Fan Big Boobies
What other nation could out-fabulous a gay pride march?
A rocking team that combines scintillating football and five star ballet.
A consulate that takes pride in its nation and its people (that’s how I interpreted the free beer).
Plus fans who know how to paaaartaay.
Everything is oranjed to do it all over again on Saturday. Can’t wait! No, literally can’t – I’m starting my journey NOW. After all, don’t want to be late!
romanbritons 